parenting, parenting skills, parenting styles James Dudelson parenting, parenting skills, parenting styles James Dudelson

Gifting an Experience

When toys and Roblox don't cut it anymore, what kind of gift can you give your children (and yourself)? An experience, of course!

A father carries his young child over his shoulder

If you follow my blog and podcast then you know my 8-yr-old son Aaron is not very interested in any gifts other than Robux, the virtual currency players use in Roblox to acquire all sorts of virtual stuff, like helmets or designer clothing - though I’m sure this feature is not unique to Roblox I’m still suffering sticker shock over a special hairdo and a weird armor-like suit Aaron “bought”, which can’t even be worn in the real world! Having said that, I don’t think most people would want to actually wear it outside their gaming.

But I digress. The bottom line is that Aaron is not interested in the rest of the toys and gifts kids his age normally want, at least not in the same measure - even his ever-favorite Lego had taken a hit, he hardly touched them these days. I’ve been finding myself searching for interesting science kits, outstanding board games or card games, and even almost got him a baby Yoda, though he doesn’t watch The Mandalorian nor has developed the Star Wars itch.

What kind of gift can you get a kid who really doesn’t seem to want anything?

“Why don’t you get him an experience? That’s what’s hot these days, so my son tells me,” my brother Mark suggested.

“An experience? He’s a little bit young for that, don’t you think?”

“Not that kind of experience, Jimmy. Geez! I mean, like a trip or a special playdate with friends.”

“An experience, huh.”

“Yeah, like those places where you go to paint and drink wine,” Mark paused for a second. “That one is only for adults.”

“Glad you clarified that for me.” 

I thought about what Mark said. Maybe he was unto something? I thought it was worth a try, so I looked for gift experiences online. A quick search took me to PureWow.com and their article on suggested experiences for kids (here’s the link: https://www.purewow.com/family/experience-gifts-for-kids) Their list covers a wide range of kits and memberships that I found cool and potentially fun. Knowing my kid though I figured learning how to make chocolate truffles or a virtual tour on Amazon.com might not cut it. Besides the Roblox coding course listed in the article - more hours in a digital environment? I don’t think so - I really was unsure of what or if anything would interest Aaron. 

I realized it was Aaron who needed to look through this list. I was lying in bed with my laptop open on this website when he ran in.

“Dad, can I have the iPhone?”

“You know you can’t.”

“Ok.”

“Come here. Let me show you something.”

Half-heartedly, he slumped himself next to me.

I explained to him what gifting an experience was and showed him the offerings. I did not tell him the gift was for him, though.

We spent about 45 minutes going through the website’s recommendations, discussing the merits of each. There were theme park adventures, and wood crafting kits. I was trying to measure his level of interest by how long his attention lingered over each entry. I got mostly “meh” and downright disinterest. So far the magic show had held his attention the longest.

“The magic show sounds kinda cool,” I said as casually as possible.

“Yeah”

“I mean, if someone gifted you a magic show it would be fun, right?”

“Meh. Maybe.”

“I could be your assistant…”

Aaron rolled his eyes and laughed.

I woke up a couple of hours later. I could say that this constant napping is an age thing but, alas, it’s a talent I share with my Dad, who could fall asleep anywhere at any time his entire life.

I found Aaron in the living room building a Lego structure, which he hadn’t done in a long time. I sat on the couch, just watching him.

He noticed me and ran over to show me what he had put together.

“Dad?”

“What?”

“Can we look at that list again?”

As we sat side by side looking at the webpage again I realized that searching for the perfect gift experience had become the experience itself.

Life can be so simple sometimes.

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