Should Kids Get an Allowance?

I was getting caught up with my reading ( I often read two-three books at a time) when Aaron came into the living room with a serious look on his face. His whole demeanor made me a little apprehensive. What had happened? Was he ok? Maybe a bully at school? Tummy ache? I tried to keep my composure.

“Is everything OK?,” I asked him.

His answer was quick and to the point.

“We have to talk, Dad”

Oh crap!, I thought to myself. He’s seven! Isn’t he a little too young to be having “the Talk”? I tried to keep a cool and collected face while my mind raced through how I could best deflect his questions about The Facts of Life - you know, the birds and the bees? I knew one day we would have to have “the Talk” - but why now? Hmmm… Maybe he wasn’t buying the stork story anymore? Maybe I should have not told him I found him in a cabbage patch? I thought he knew I was joking. I hope he knows I was joking...

I was running ahead of myself. I mustered a calm smile and voice to match. Putting down my book I asked him: “What is this about?” - and held my breath.

“My allowance,” he replied, changing his seriousness into a smile.

Phew! Bullet dodged!,  was my first thought, followed immediately by He wants what?

“Aaron, you don’t get an allowance.“

“I know, Dad. That’s what I want to talk to you about.”

The other Facts of Life Talk - money. This was going to be interesting. 

“Aaron, do you know what an allowance is?”

“Yes, it's money you give me each week.” 

”Well, that’s not how it works. It’s not free money. To get money each week, which would be your allowance, you have to do chores.”

Aaron narrowed his eyes and pouted slightly.

“You mean, work?”

“Right, jobs around the house like walking the dog, cleaning your room, folding laundry, pulling weeds from the garden.  Even listening to your Daddy when he asks you to do something, I would consider that a chore too.”

I could see Aaron was listening to my every word, staring hard at me. He took a moment to think about what I had said.

“It’s not worth it. Keep the allowance, Dad,” he replied. Then added with a shrug: “I get everything now and I don’t have to do anything.”

And with that, he got up to leave.

What? Did he just turn down his first job offer? I thought it was a great deal. Was I spoiling him and that’s why he didn’t see the point in putting any effort into getting his own income? What was I teaching him? Am I just a money tree to him? 

I was puzzled. I also felt jilted, used and not a little worried about my parental skills. My kid did not appreciate having to work for money… Houston, we have a problem.

 Then, just before he left the room, he stopped and turned around to look at me.

“I love you, Dad,” and off he went.

It dawned on me that what he meant was that he had everything he needed, that he didn’t lack for anything and, therefore, there was no need to have more. 

So maybe it’s a good thing he’ll think twice about accepting offers and won’t necessarily want to have things for the sake of just having them, like sometimes I do.

Maybe Aaron already knows that there are things that money can’t buy? After all, he’s been listening to Can’t Buy Me Love by The Beatles since he was a baby. 

I decided to pat myself on the back. Good job, Dad!

I also let go of the armchair, my knuckles still white and my nails neatly imprinted on the fabric. 

WATCH THIS EPISODE!

Watch Aaron and me discuss getting an allowance on my podcast episode. Guest starring Dan Miller.